I haven’t read your article yet, but I’m about to.
UGH. I am simultaneously frustrated and excited in this pre-engaged state. Of course everything is all rainbows and puppies with us, and it’s beautiful, and I can’t stop thinking about when he’s going to propose and how amazing it will be to officially combine lives. But DAMN is it frustrating. My boyfriend is really into wanting his proposal to be a surprise, so he refuses to discuss things with me. Right now I’m about to graduate college, and since we’re long distance, I’m thinking of it as an opportunity to look for a job close to him. But if I’m going to uproot my life, I want more concrete ideas about when he wants to get engaged and married. He just refuses to think that discussion is necessary because it gives things away. And I just want to tell him that it’s really not going to give it away to tell me what season or what YEAR even. We’ve had discussions about wanting to get married, and we agree on a vague length of time that it’s acceptable to date before an engagement (ie: I’m not waiting around forever, so you should know that ahead of time). Basically, we both know it’s within the next year or two, BUT I WANT TO KNOW WHEN DAMNIT!
Has anyone else ever had issues with guys just not wanting to discuss the whens concretely, even if they’ll discuss the whats? It’s driving me nuts when the issue is relatively immediate.